For one, to the “Oppa Didn’t Mean It1!1!” assholes-Now that you see that the upset over CAP’s words was widespread enough for CAP to issue an official statement (lacking as it was), hopefully you’ll shut the hell up about “OMG IT WASN’T BAD OMG IT WAS JUST A JOKE OMG IT IS CULTURE OMG” and see that it was wrong, through and through.
But to the point-
Now that CAP has (somewhat) apologized, Do Not-
- Tell people to just get over it-Abuse is very real. Sexism is very real. His words were obviously not cool. People have a right to still be upset and to not take his apology, whether because they still are hurt by what was said or don’t think it to be real or sincere. That is their right. Do not police their reaction or feelings on the matter.
- Tell people to support Teen Top unconditionally-“The most important thing is to support Teen Top!”, “Well now we can do what matters and support the boys!”. That language is shitty. It shows that your number one priority is Teen Top and you have no care whatsoever by the harmful thing that was said or the people it hurt. Most importantly, don’t push that mentality on others. They have ever right to choose to not support Teen Top after this incident, no matter if you in your mind didn’t think it was a big enough deal.
- Make it all about CAP & Teen Top-“OMG, I’m so glad he said this, maybe fans will stop attacking and criticizing him!” “Yay, I hope him and Teen Top haven’t been too hurt by this drama!” This. Is. Not. About. CAP. Or. The. Group. It is about the problematic nature of his words and the people it hurt. They are who matters, not him. The other members of Teen Top are unfortunate casualties of his words & given how they reacted to CAP’s words themselves, they are getting brought down by stuff they don’t think is cool, but it still isn’t about them.
- STILL make excuses for CAP and what was said-“See, I told you he wasn’t a bad guy!”, “Judge the words, not the person!” “His intentions were good, he just made a bad joke!”. Those are really terrible ways to belittle the harm of what was said, shift away responsibility from CAP for his words, dismiss how people feel, and to police how they should react to what was said. Stop doing that.
- Canonize CAP as a living saint for apologizing-Apologizing for being wrong does not deserve medals or awards. It is required, the bare minimum, the least you can do. He isn’t some phenomenal or otherworldly human being for doing exactly what he should, which is take responsibility for his shitty words.
I repeat, you MUST understand-
- Regardless if you choose to continue to support Teen Top or not, it is without a doubt that what CAP said was wrong and fucked up, and fans have a right to be upset.-‘Nuff said.
If you’ve been engaging in some bullshit apologism for his words & domestic abuse and sexism, you’d do well to issue an apology of your own.
I have messaged Teen Top on me2day, asking CAP to apologize for the statement he has made on Open Wide Studio.
If any of you want to help out, please let me know of any other websites that Teen Top personally uses.
To help out, go here: http://me2day.net/teen-top
Sign up (if you aren’t a member already), add Teen Top as a friend, then click on the arrow that shows up on the top right corner of their icon when you hover over it. Then you will see the messages link right under that icon.
If you know Korean, feel free to send a message of your own.
If not, here is one that might draw Teen Top’s attention if they get enough messages. A friend of mine (who is a native speaker) translated this into Korean for me so don’t get on my ass about how wrong you think it is because I will ignore you and I will not care. It gets the point across.
“CAP 오빠 , 성차별주의적인 태도 좀 고치고 사과를 해주세요. Wide Open Studio 에서 딸을 때린다던 예기요.
유럽 과 미국에 사는 펜들이 그 코멘트 듣고 많이 실망했어요.”
“CAP oppa, please fix your sexist attitude and please apologize. The thing you said at the Wide Open Studio.
The fans living in Europe and America heard that comment and were disappointed.”
I used oppa since most of you are female fans. If you’re male like me (but younger than CAP), use CAP 형 instead of CAP 오빠 in the beginning of the sentence. Or if you prefer to use -sshi, it would be CAP 씨.
I do not guarantee this will work, but I am taking action on this matter instead of sitting there and bitching.
Also, if you think this is a waste of time, just ignore this message.
I am not doing this for you, I am doing this because I want to.
MORE WEBSITES UPDATE: http://circle.ufotown.com/teentop
By now, many people are aware of Teen Top’s C.A.P’s comments on Mnet Wide Open Studio. If not, here’s a post that summarizes the situation (with bonus screencaps!)
Basically, CAP says that he’ll buy a son whatever he wants and… “if it’s a girl, [he’ll] hit her and drag her home.”
Everyone else in the studio, including his fellow Teen Top members are pretty shocked by this statement and ask why; CAP explains, saying “Because it’s dangerous for her outside!”
Goodcool, the writer of the post previously linked to, writes that:
Niel then proceeds to ask him “so you’ll hit her at home?” and Chunji adds “there’s even more dangerous” (I’m going to assume this is a typo by the translators and “there’s” is meant to be “that’s”).
CAP then answers “to make her obedient” and this ends his portion of the discussion.
So, this isn’t about protection at all. His words make it very evident that CAP prioritizes and values men over women, and that he thinks child abuse is an acceptable approach to parenting. This attitude isn’t uncommon all over the world. We don’t exist in a vacuum, after all, and patriarchal structures are firmly in place all throughout a variety of societies.
Domestic violence is not a joke. Long-term consequences of child-abuse include (but are not limited to:)
- Poor mental and emotional health. In one long-term study, as many as 80 percent of young adults who had been abused met the diagnostic criteria for at least one psychiatric disorder at age 21. These young adults exhibited many problems, including depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and suicide attempts. (Other common psychological and emotional conditions associated with abuse are Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Reactive Attachment Disorder.)
- Social difficulties. Children who experience rejection or neglect are more likely to develop antisocial traits as they grow up.
- Impaired brain development. Child abuse and neglect have been shown, in some cases, to cause important regions of the brain to fail to form or grow properly, resulting in impaired development.
- Poor physical health. Several studies have shown a relationship between various forms of household dysfunction (including childhood abuse) and poor health. Adults who experienced abuse or neglect during childhood are more likely to suffer from physical ailments such as allergies, arthritis, asthma, bronchitis, high blood pressure, and ulcers.
This is hardly an exhaustive list; the negative consequences on the life of a survivor of domestic violence are innumerable. If you’re thinking “well yeah, of course beating your children is awful, but hitting them every once in awhile is okay,” studies have shown that children who are spanked tend to have lower IQs. While it would be ridiculous to say that spanking alone determines intelligence, research has shown that it is a factor.
And let’s go back to what CAP said - that he would hit his daughter to make her obedient. This is what misogyny sounds like. It is the pervasive idea that women cannot and should not be independent people in their own right but rather submissive and passive to male figures; that men are the (unquestioned) authority and women exist to fulfill their desires and commands. That is simply unacceptable. When contrasted with his attitude towards his hypothetical male offspring, it is impossible to not see a stark double standard at play.
So please, before you start shouting “oppa didn’t mean it” or “it was just a joke”, please consider what he said and the larger ramifications of his statements.